Happy Brithay!

Sat.     11/20/10   11:45 PM

Today hasn't been that great. Long story. Lots of homework. Celebrated my b-day with Kevin and we fought and I cried. It was up and down. We did have a delicious dinner though. Kevin made me soy chicken. Mostly I'm just sad right now. My sleep was horrendous. I drank Fanta all day to keep me awake. I took an Ambien CR, but I don't really feel it yet. Now I'm worried it won't work as well as regular Ambien. It used to work better. Lame.

I got a bunch of stuff done though. Lots of school stuff. Several assignments. Still have more to do, but I'm almost there! 2 weeks left of class after Thanksgiving and I'll have made it through the worst semester, toughest semester of my life. I will kiss the floor that day, because I keep thinking it won't happen. I won't make it. But I'm doing it!


Sun. 11/21/10     11:39 P.M.

Ambien. Yes I amont tired mosly. I haven't slept well in too long! Too long so I'm doubly exausted tonight. It was my brithay to day! I got really good, sweet, though full presents from everyone. Nice. Amber (my niece) kept loving me. It made me feel good.

I love my mom- she does such good thingf for me. I really love her. Good mom. She needs toknow that Everyone needs to know. I love my husband. Feel bad for stuff that has happed. I love him. He is my best friend. We don't have enough sex. Probably my fault, but I feel sad and it makes it harder to sleep. So does guilt man and guilt about my family. Feal disappoingting right now. Gotta get through. You CAN fix your maladaptive shit. You can.

Wish I had more tim and less time. Wish I could just quit and take a class abouthis. Nothing else to say. Kinda sad... Sleep is still horrible.


11/22/10

Ambieme-  yes. It is. Stressed out. Ambie makes ist a little better befor bed. I love my Kevin. He's a good man. I want to cuddle. I want him to be on anbien with me and not sleep with me. So its not m being crazy. I feel tired and stressed out so Kevin better hug me.

Ambien has sunk me today.